I be a good righter.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

A funny thing happened on the way to get Splenda.

Okay. So, I do a coffee run every morning. It's very involved, loads of coffees to get. And I've developed mad skillz surrounding this simple-seeming task. I've been known to do a three tier tray run (which means that all the people who I walk by like to say random things like, "Hey! What time is it?" They think it's hilarious, until I transfer the three tiers to one hand and give them the time.)

Aside: I also get lunches. And a few days ago The Anonymous Production Assistant was waxing poetic about how it seems a strange route from getting lunches to becoming a writer. Now here's the thing. I can understand the confusion... if the job entailed ONLY getting lunches and coffee. Now, perhaps I'm in a different kind of situation. I don't know. But, my entire day is not consumed by lunches and coffees. My day is consumed by research and the room and proofing and... all the things that are making me become a BETTER writer. Because of these things, it seems a normal path from assistant-dom to Writer-dom. Because my days are one hundred percent about making our show the best show possible -- and learning how to do that from some pretty fucking incredible writers.


So, yesterday, I was at Starbucks. Doing the usual. And there was a huge crowd around the sugar/milk counter. So, I just kind of found a spot where I could just reach in and grab a Splenda. I didn't notice, during my reach, that one of the milk jugs had hooked into the cleavage of my low-cut T-shirt. So, as I straightened up from the reach, the jug latched itself to my shirt and let gravity do its thing. That's right. The jug pulled my shirt completely down. Basically, I flashed ALL of Starbucks.

I have to do the same coffee run in a minute here.

Thankfully I'm wearing a turtleneck...


  • At August 27, 2009 10:01 AM, Blogger Kira said…

    OMG, I totally see that making its way into one of your scripts someday!

  • At August 28, 2009 6:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Funny post!

    Others posted similar objections.

    As I said there, I understand the apprenticeship aspect of it. In fact, I’ve covered that very topic in the past.

    My point is, one hires (and fires) an assistant based on her assisting abilities, not her writing abilities.

    If there’s a correlation between the two, it’s probably negative. But that doesn’t change the fact that many good assistants get undeserved writing assignments and, I suspect, many good writers have been fired before they got their chance, because they got the cole slaw instead the potato salad.

  • At August 28, 2009 6:12 PM, Blogger BooM said…

    I've changed it to allow openid. I think. Maybe. I'm still reeling from flashing Starbucks. So, you know...

    As to the other... yeah. I get it.

  • At August 30, 2009 12:29 AM, Blogger LadyUranus said…

    So, looking through your archives, I have a quick question-- did the internship lead directly to the job? I had a sweet internship, but it seems to have lead to nothing, and I'm wondering how to leverage it.

    I used to work at Starbucks-- though your story never occurred, I did have a guy immediately drop 4 frapaccinos on the floor and all over the other customers waiting.

  • At September 01, 2009 10:54 AM, Blogger Important Hollywood Agent said…

    I need to start going to your coffee shop.


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